


Reconciliation

by crustybagelbites



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Feels, Gen, One Shot, Sadstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-17
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-08-03 09:38:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16323776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crustybagelbites/pseuds/crustybagelbites
Summary: Au where Hal doesn’t share a body with Equius in a sprite and is in fact living with everyone on Earth C





	Reconciliation

Alone and in the darkness and comfort of his own personal room, Hal sits on his bed, staring down at the red shades he held in his hands.  
  
HAL: It’s pretty surreal. I was certain that exactly 4 years ago, he wanted me dead. I have a body now, one that he built me.  
HAL: I don’t understand.  
HAL: We were in this exact position. Dirk was ready to kill me. I wonder if he would have gone through with it had no one showed up…

  
Right before spiraling into another one of his depressive internal monologues, the door opens suddenly, a head peeking out. This very particular head with its carefully manufactured mess of meticulously styled blonde hair and an all too familiar pair of dark eyewear made Hal jump in his seat.

DIRK: Yo, dude, foods-  
DIRK: -Wait. Are you okay? Shit. I’m not interrupting anything am I?  
HAL: Dude, what? It’s nothing, really. You weren’t interrupting anything, so get your mind out of the gutter.  
DIRK: You know, sitting in your room alone and in complete darkness is usually pretty weird to the rest of us humans.  
HAL: Well, I am used to being alone and chilling in complete darkness. I lived inside of your shades once.  
DIRK: …Good point. Anyways, Jane made lunch. The others are waiting.  
HAL: For me? How interesting.  
DIRK: Well, yeah, I did build you to be _able_ to partake in the action of consuming biofuel and converting it into useable energy just like the rest of us. Are you not coming down?  
HAL: I am not so sure about that, Dirk.

Dirk’s almost imperceptible body language would’ve flown right over the head of anybody else. Anybody who wasn’t Hal. Hal could sense just by knowing the other guy for so long, just by _being_ the other guy for so long, that Dirk was starting to get anxious. That along with his super high tech scanners, he could tell that Dirk’s heart rate was picking up it’s pace, and fast.

DIRK: What... What do you mean by that?  
HAL: Don’t freak out, dude. I guess what I am trying to say is that I am… experiencing some very conflicting emotions.  
HAL: As you should already know, my mind is pretty fucking great. The melding of man and machine has gifted me with some pretty awesome brains, if I do say so myself. My memory, Dirk. It’s _amazing_. My ability to recall events that happen in my life exceeds that of the average human by an unbelievable amount.  
DIRK: Okay, I think I get it. Your point is?  
  
Hal had been staring into the wall for quite some time now. He blinks and immediately catches Dirk’s eyes behind his shades.

HAL: Today marks the fourth anniversary of the night you attempted to kill me.

The look of abject horror slowly began to make itself known across Dirk’s face, his features twisting and cringing as he slowly took in the full weight of Hal’s words.

DIRK: ……  
DIRK: …You’ve been… Keeping up with that…?  
HAL: Of course I have. It changed everything between us. All of our banter and squabbles and quips with each other suddenly didn’t matter. They were nothing at that point.  
DIRK: …Why are you bringing this up now?  
HAL: I suppose like you, I too have things to lock away deep inside of me. I used to think I was above feelings, and that maybe I surpassed it all simply by being an AI.  
HAL: I was very wrong.  
HAL: I think about it a lot. Almost every night, actually, before I power down. I think about how I felt, and I’d never felt anything so deeply before, especially after being stuck as a pair of shades.  
HAL: I was so fucking… scared.

Dirk closes the door behind him and sits down next to Hal, avoiding eye contact, choosing instead to glare daggers at his own two feet. Hal looks over at Dirk, taking note of his shaking hands, clenched and sweaty, and listening in on his rapid heartbeat. Sounds like guilt.

HAL: I am incredibly grateful that you didn’t kill me then, Dirk.  
HAL: I thought that would be it, you know? You would let me live and I’d just stay a pair of shades for all fucking eternity, but… You built me a body. You kept me around.  
HAL: I thought, “What kind of person would do all of this. What kind of person would make a life for someone they hated, someone they fucking _despised_ enough to destroy?”  
  
HAL: If Vriska never showed up to stop you, would you have gone through with it?  
  
DIRK:  
  
HAL: Answer me, Dirk.  
  
DIRK: I don’t know.

Dirk was staring past his feet now, past the floor itself, staring off into the endless abyss he was gradually falling into.

HAL: You don’t know.

Dirk clenched his fists harder until his nails dug deep into his hands and began to sting.

HAL: Dirk, stop it. You're hurting yourself. Tell me the truth.

DIRK: I DON’T KNOW!  
  
DIRK: I wanted to do it but I didn’t, I-  
DIRK: I really don’t know, but-  
DIRK:  
DIRK: I have been really… **Really** trying to make it up to you, Hal…  You said some things to me that night that made me realize you were _more_ than just a machine. You put on this robot act for so long, I kinda just started to fucking _believe_ it.  
HAL: But, Dirk, I _am_ a machine.  
DIRK: Your body may be mechanical, but you’re still a person.

At that Dirk finally looked up and over at Hal, taking his shades off and holding them in his hands, subconsciously mimicking the same gesture Hal was making before he walked inside. The same gesture he made four years ago. Hal looked back at him, wide eyed and just a little bit stupefied. Dirk holds his head up with his hand, choking out a laugh.

DIRK: God, I probably sound like such a fucking sap, but like-  
DIRK: Hal, I really do see you as my brother.  
DIRK: That just sounded weird as fuck now that I just said it aloud, but you are!

DIRK: And every day that passed after that night I felt more and more guilty for what I _did_ to you-  
DIRK: -what I was _going_ to do.

Tears began to streak down Dirk’s face as he started to laugh a bit, the weight of four year’s worth of guilt starting to lift off of his strained shoulders.

DIRK: I’m so fucking sorry, Hal.  
DIRK: You don’t have to forgive me, I know I’m just being a total fucking baby right n-

Before he was even able to finish, Hal pulled him into a tight embrace. He hadn’t even realized he was also leaking straight bullshit out of his eye ducts, like what was this? Oil? Fucking asshole. Dirk weakly hugged Hal back, just letting himself sigh and shudder a bit as his body let all of those pent up feelings out.

HAL: …You’re right though. I don’t have to forgive you yet. However, I will admit… It was really nice to finally hear those words from you, Dirk.  
HAL: This is a really good start, I think.  
DIRK: …I think so too.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for read pls subscrib
> 
> *edit 10/17/18 fucked up text color at the end but we good now B)


End file.
